So, I did it…at work I voiced a concern that was really bothering me for a few days now. After the discussion, I felt a split second of regret, followed by relief. Speaking my mind at work was something that I would have never done a year ago. Doubt has taken up residency in my mind for far too long, and I’m tired of it.
While I still have many things to complete in my room, I’m relieved that I had the chance to speak. I can only hope that my opinion will be taken seriously.
Today brought a snow storm that worsened as the day wore on. Our center had a delayed opening, yet the issue of it being open at all today remained as the winds and snowfall gained strength. We were all relieved when the center closed early.
When I got home, I took an extended nap. Perhaps it was from me working non-stop and rising early, but I truly needed the rest. My dreams during that nap were quite strange though…I was back at work, and numbers were strewn across the floors. Forts of every creation were arranged down the halls.
I guess my dreams are calling to my creative side, to get more connected with this other part of myself. Work has certainly awakened my creativity. Now it’s just the need to branch out.
I really do take a long time getting things done. As I work in my room, finishing up art projects and planning more, along with making the classroom ‘theme-ready’, I realized that I take very long to get tasks done. I do run a class alone, so watching toddlers while getting a room ready is quite eventful! I am glad with what I’ve accomplished these past 3 days, so that’s a positive direction. Working slowly also means that I catch meaningful details. I can only hope that it will work out well in the end.
‘Just take it on’, was what ran through my mind as I entered my classroom this morning. ‘Just walk in and take back what’s yours’. So I did just that…I began to fill my classroom with cheerful additions and projects. If that’s what my superiors want, they will get it. Mine (and my students’) creations, and no one else’s.
Reaching for your own personal achievement comes with its criticisms, and that’s okay. It’s a challenge, but it’s not my first time handling tension. I just need to follow my threaded path. Just take it on, and keep moving.
Ideas float in my head like puzzle pieces scattered across the floor. I long to have the big picture, the framework laid out, but I’m at a loss for inspiration. It takes months before a small piece of the puzzle begins to form. I’m in disbelief as to why it took me forever to reach this idea, but I also understand, given the emotional ride I’ve been on during 2017.
Will this process be completed overnight? No. I’m just relieved that I can now see my road of productivity laid out right in front of me. Will I stay on track? I can only hope so.
“You must never despair of human nature’.
Outside my window, I watch the steady rainfall coating my central NJ neighborhood. All is quiet as I do routine tasks: closing a P.O. Box, paying bills, etc. The TV is off, yet earlier I watched News 12 and the Weather Channel, viewing the tragic stories that Hurricane Harvey unleashed in Houston and Southeast Texas. Watching the anguish in families’ faces as they’re rescued, the extreme sadness. Years of memories It makes me think of my region’s ordeal when Sandy struck five years ago. I lived near Washington Heights at the time, and neighborhood didn’t suffer serious damage. For many people, however, the damage was widespread, as they spent days in shelters, while others who stayed in their homes endured power outages lasting for days.
As I watch the coverage of Harvey’s wrath, I think about the sadness these evacuees are going through. How many of them were never told to leave their homes, only to watch water quickly take over their neighborhoods. While all of this is so devastating, many people are coming together to provide much needed supplies to those in need. People are doing their part to rescue the animals sadly left behind in Texas. In these distressing times, all we can do is come together and provide support to those in need.