It’s hard to believe it’s been 9 years since my mother passed away. I went through the motions of today: going to work, tending to my left wrist while managing toddlers, doing what I needed to do for the classroom. Sometimes it’s better to just keep my mind occupied, to think about my mom until later, like right now.
My mother was always very reserved, yet I could always tell that she was always very genuine about her thoughts and feelings. When she spoke, her words truly came from her heart. Sometimes I would call my mom and there would be gaps of silence, but we were both involved in each other’s conversation. I know that may sound odd, since two people naturally feel the need to fill in gaps of silence with an endless stream of words. That wasn’t necessary with Mom. We each understood where the other person was coming from.
I know that Mom is always with me, that she’s never far from me. I wish I could speak to her on the phone one more time though, as I’m enduring this struggle with my wrist, and other life situations. Her presence was always memorable.
It’s really sad that Toys R Us is closing all its stores here in the US, because the word out there is ‘children no longer play with toys’. I can’t believe how far children have come from not playing with toys on a regular basis. When I was younger, we always went outside with different toys, and we played with different dolls and toys at home. Now, thanks to our ‘digital world’, children seem to have an aversion to going outside, preferring to look at a phone or tablet screen. It’s really disheartening to see, since there’s a whole world of adventure to experience playing with dolls. The storytelling through the eyes of a child is valuable when they’re playing with dolls and stuffed animals. I see this each day with my toddlers when they’re interacting with dolls and stuffed animals in the Dramatic Play area. The scenarios they create are unique, and not something you would see when looking at a computer screen. As much as our phones and tablets are useful, we are becoming very dependent on them, and now passing this dependency on to younger generations.
I’m really glad that I completed a pillow these past couple days. The recent nor’easter caused my center to be closed for two days, so I took the opportunity to work on the pillow I’ve been creating for my Cozy Corner. It went pretty smoothly! It turned out to be smaller than what I pictured, but I’m happy with the end result! I began working on a bigger pillow, but needed to pause after crocheting the first 20 rows. I have tendonitis in my left wrist (near the thumb), and although I’m right-handed, my left hand/wrist began feeling sore, so I had to pause for another day. I made an appointment with an orthopedist for next week to treat my wrist again. I had it treated back in July, and I lived with no pain until a few weeks ago. I’m hoping that the soreness doesn’t get any worse in the next few days. Waiting for a referral is so unfortunate. Necessary, but unfortunate.
In a couple days, Andy and I will have our lunch gathering in Northern NJ with my family, yet it seems like only one member in my immediate family will be there. Although I’m sad that my grandparents won’t be able to attend, I completely understand. My grandfather can no longer venture outdoors like he used to, and he shouldn’t force himself to. My grandmother wants to stay by his side, which is also understandable.
I’m still very hopeful for my family to make it. Aside from a major storm to happen, it’s still taking place on Saturday. Since Andy and I have been together for 5 years, and are now engaged, it’s time for both families to get together.
I watched the CNN town hall special centered on the Parkland school shooting last night. It was truly heartbreaking to hear students’ questions, especially those who lost friends right before their eyes. It was equally tragic to hear the words of the politicians who visited the meeting, as they were pledging to create laws on gun control in the weeks ahead. It’s another sign of the cycle of violence and indifference taking place once again. The assault rifle ban should have been renewed years ago. It may have prevented the deaths of innocent children and teachers who protected their lives.
Another topic that’s emerged is our President considering allowing teachers to carry a weapon as they’re working. As a teacher, I never thought that the idea of carrying a concealed weapon would be added to the responsibilities I take on with my students. I dedicated my life to teach children to support one another, and expand on their knowledge. Carrying a weapon while teaching will not solve the assault rifle ban dilemma. Children will fall under the constant threat of dangerous people carrying assault weapons, coupled with the constant threat of gunfire should an anxious educator fires their weapon improperly. Given that the spokeswoman of the NRA has children of her own, I can only hope that she would realize the tragedy of the gun control debate soon enough.
Today my fiance Andy and I celebrate 5 years together. It’s wonderful that we’ve shared many memories. We’ve known each other for several years, but lost touch after we graduated from college years ago. Thankfully social media reconnected our paths a few years ago.
Andy and I got engaged over a year ago, and I’m looking forward to many more wonderful years and memories with him. He is someone that I would share everything with, and he encourages every dream I reach out to achieve.
People can hold grudges against one another pretty easily. It’s tough for me to figure out. I see it happening in both my personal and work life. Since we are all adults, we should be able to talk about our grievances, find some kind of common ground. For now, I just stay focused on my goals, and continue to stay productive.
Today I hope to catch some of the Winter Olympics tonight. The opening ceremony is always exciting to watch. It will be quite a show, especially to see how both sides of Korea interact with each other.
Relaxing after a very long day. Working with toddlers is always busy, and stressful at times, but also very rewarding. The group I have at the moment have a couple of high energy children, and at times it feels like a challenge seeking the right activities to keep them engaged for long periods of time. Today I had two sensory rich activities for them to work with, and that kept the energetic children busy for a prolonged period. I most definitely need to keep other sensory projects on hand so they never grow tired of the activities in the room.
I come out of work and hear the news. Words, hurtful words were spoken from the supposed ‘leader’ of our country. The countless debates that followed afterwards, from the deeply offended to the truly shameful replies. How anyone can defend someone’s racist remarks is truly disheartening. As disappointing as it is, nothing will happen to his political standing. Unless we actively change our political landscape, he will feel powerful enough to continue shaming and berating his own people.